A few months back I was talking with a friend about her damaged uncle. My friend, while I'm sure she has struggled with different issues throughout her life, is one of those people who can just push through the discomfort quickly and emerge victoriously on the other side. To an outside viewer, she appears to do it effortlessly. I couldn't even begin to tell you what childhood mishaps attacked her self esteem because she never seems to have made them her home. My struggles more closely parallel those of her uncle and I found myself trying to explain why a man in the final decades of his life could still be struggling with "but my parents mistreated me." Repeated attempts made me believe three undeniable concepts are at work.
1. No matter how old a person is, if he or she can still mentally touch an open wound from past mistreatment, there will be a corresponding degree of rigidity and incapability to change and move forward. It is easy to assume the larger the pain, the greater the problems, but I don't think that necessarily plays out. Or at least not in an obvious way. For one thing, pain is individual. Most of my childhood problems were more of the "Barbie gets caught on the outskirts of a bad neighborhood" variety. There was a very funny moment in a very disturbing movie remake decades ago. The movie was "The Collector" and the laughable moment was when the heroine, already being stalked by her eventual killer, heatedly explains her discomfort to the police. "He gave me gifts!" I can't tell you how many times I've remembered that scene and my nervous laughter when I've tried to explain my relationship with my parents and why I've struggled with self esteem.
Pain is individual. We're not allowed to line up the damaged and judge whether or not they have a right to feel hurt. I believe an individual's problem moving forward stems less from how badly he was hurt than what he does with that pain. Do you remember one of your first childhood cuts or scrapes? Remember poking the wound throughout the healing process to see if it still hurt? A skinned knee will eventually scab over and that poke won't feel any different than it does to the adjacent skin. Emotional wounds don't heal the same way and repeated checks, rather than confirming or denying forward progress, tend to create a habit of negatively reaffirming your life. People who are stuck in this "Groundhog Day" of emotional pain seem to believe they can move to forgiveness when it no longer hurts and don't realize that the healing will begin (and it will hurt less) AFTER they forgive.
2. Frequently, pain colors "the damaged's" entire life. On a ten scale for difficulty, they wake up every day at about an eight. Before the red lights, traffic jams, road rage or other daily challenges, they wake up thinking: "What the hell might happen next. I don't know if I can stand much more." There's a good chance they have at least a few documentable obvious problems like debt or health issues. Their baggage contains a whole lot of entitlement because "my life has just been so hard or unfair, I really need someone to acknowledge or validate my pain." They don't need to poke the wound to see if it still hurts. It always hurts. It never goes away. That is exactly how I felt during the years leading up to my divorce as well as a few afterwards. "Can't anybody see I'm drowning here? Somebody, anybody, please throw me a line."
I was talking with a friend recently about one of her retail customers. The woman was one of those constant complainers. Nothing was right. Nothing was what she wanted. All of which added up in the customer's view to discounts she was entitled to receive as well as a free coke. I listened, all the while feeling very fortunate she had not been my customer. Then I tried to explain to my friend why the woman might be that way only to discover my friend already knew. A core limiting belief of people in that mode of thinking is "no one understands me." In reality, a lot of people do understand and aren't without empathy at your situation. They genuinely are sorry for all of the lemons life has handed you. What they don't understand is why you felt the need to build a monument to that pain and move in there. At the same time, you are not a lot of fun to be around and "if you can't find a way to "move on" emotionally, could you please just "move on" physically. Seriously, there are other stores that sell this stuff, you know?"
This sort of person is stuck where they are because everything is filtered through "me." Rather than noticing how hard the sales person may have tried before they gave up, they will be stuck in the fervent outrage of "how could they treat me that way? Don't they know the customer is always right? I'll show them. I'm never coming here again!" Never realizing the sales person is probably thinking, "You promise?"
The empathy that "damaged" is looking for is also the exit door he or she keeps missing. It is a "get what you give" world. If you aren't receiving any empathy, appreciation or consideration, there is a high likelihood you aren't giving them to anybody either. Besides which, remember that notion "pain is individual?" The worst childhood story I have ever heard involved the children of an undiagnosed schizophrenic woman who was also a single mom. For the first eight to twelve years of their lives, mom locked them in a closet every day because "the voices" told her that was where they would be safest. I don't know about you, but I know it wouldn't help my self esteem very much to be outrageously indignant about my poor treatment as a customer only to discover my persecutor's childhood was far worse than mine. That isn't even because I know it is a "get what you give" world. It is simply because I have this notion perhaps I don't deserve things I am unwilling to give to others.
3. There comes a time where it is no longer a question of what heinous things may have happened to you. If you aren't happy with your life, it isn't because of your parents, your government, your president, the Democrats or the Republicans or your boss. You are the one ultimately responsible for your life and if you aren't happy, it is exactly like the internet meme says: "If you want something you've never had, you have to do something you've never done."
Maybe it is as simple as counting your blessings instead of infringements against you. Maybe the world is so offensive because you really are looking to be offended. Maybe each time your thoughts repeat the word "me," as in the sentence "how could you do this to me," you could ask yourself what they might have been feeling right before they hurt your feelings. Could you have unknowingly hurt their feelings? If that is possible, is it possible they didn't know they hurt you? Is it possible that was never their intention?
If you can't do any of that, consider this. Writers, musicians and painters frequently learn their art by emulating the voice or techniques of established masters they admire. Find someone you admire who has whatever it is you feel you lack. Success. Love. Happiness. They have it. You want it. So do what they do. Read their blog or their biography. Look up their Wikipedia. Find out as much as you can about how they have lived their life and repeat it. Fake it to make it. Repeat it every day until you are living the life you want on your own.
Tuesday, May 27, 2014
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Because people always ask .....
Whenever I mention I am in the process of working through my deceased parents' estate and selling their house, someone will say, "I need to get advice from you in the future about what to do about that." Let's just say this is that advice.
There are two aspects to handling your parents estate to consider. The first is easy. It is simple legal paperwork. Don't attach a lot of fear or unhappiness to it. Just as when you were born, your parents filed a birth certificate announcing your name and relationship to them; paperwork will be filed announcing your death and the choices you made regarding what happened to your property. You can also file paperwork pre-deciding choices you may have in how you choose to die. Every bit of work you do towards doing that paperwork while you are still healthy is a loving gift to your children.
My father had a stroke in July 2010. He lost none of his mobility, but a very large portion of his memory. The very last check that cleared his bank account from before his stroke was one to the lawyer who drew up his Will, Trust, Durable Power of Attorney and an Advanced Health Directive regarding what lengths he would like a hospital to go to keep him alive should he need a ventilator or other machines.
I was very very lucky. I hadn't been nagging him to do any of that. Like most of you, the notion of bringing it up to him, particularly the part about the Will and Trust, felt like counting his money as my own before he died. He was 77 years old when he had those documents drawn up. He did not live to be 80.
You will need all four of those documents. Look in bookstores and online to see if you can do them yourself, but you will probably need to contact a lawyer to have them done. I had that and a few other things done a year or so ago and it cost me around $1000.00. Keep the originals. Show them to whoever insists on seeing an original, but make a lot of copies and give only those out. If you have only the Will, instead of the Will and Trust, you will lose money and wait somewhere around a year for probate to close. This is true no matter how simple the estate may seem. Do yourself a favor and make sure you get both the Will and the Trust. I cannot stress this enough.
You will need the Power of Attorney in case your parent gets dementia or is somehow otherwise incapacitated and you have to handle their affairs. Even with the Power of Attorney, you will be amazed how many businesses will insist that you fill out "their" forms regarding Power of Attorney. I was actually listed on my father's bank accounts as a co-owner, which is also a good idea to help pay for the medical bills that will begin adding up. It makes an easy transition from your father signing the checks to you signing the checks. Consider your name also being added to the title to your parents' automobiles or mobile home, if they happen to live in one.
Remember to check all medical bills against any medicare or health insurance that should be picking up part of the tab. They will not do any of the legwork for you. Avoid feeling cheap or like your parent doesn't deserve whatever medicare or assistance he or she has coming. You have no idea how long the illness will last or whatever illnesses may be waiting behind the current one. The goal is to keep your parent funded during this trying period. You can't afford to overlook any discounts or assistance that may help.
A side comment about dementia. If your parent suffers from that and is still able to live at home with you or outside caregiver assistance, at a bare minimum, remove the car keys where he or she can't find them. If you can get the car out of sight and mind, you will be happier. Trust me, you are going to hear, "When will I get to drive again?" more times than your parent ever heard "are we there yet?" It is an uncomfortable position to be in, essentially being your parents' parent. Telling him, "I didn't say you can't drive, the doctor did. They revoked your driver's license." It just doesn't get the job done.
Try to summon up all of the patience you can muster. Inside his mind, he does probably know what he wants to say. He just can't pick the right words anymore. My father went through a period where nearly everything became the word "Sine-aid." Think how frustrating it must be to think television remote and only be able to mumble "Sine-aid." Whatever personality he or she had before the stroke? If it was a bit negative or angry, expect that times two. Don't expect to receive patience in return. He feels powerless and chances are, you are the poster child for everything he thinks is currently messed up and wrong.
It is a very good time to discover small little tasks or favors he can do for you. Feeling useful and needed is an excellent combatant to the depression and boredom he may be beginning to face. Seniors with a good attitude who have dementia due to a stroke can recover quite a bit of what was lost. Or at least that was what I found when I read about it. Giving them puzzles or video games like "Big Brain Academy" can help. Try not to be too disappointed if they have a bad attitude. My father immediately sneered at any gift that showed up at his house even slightly looking like it was "good for him."
I can't offer much advice about the other aspect to handling your parents' estate. Your siblings. That was another place where I was very lucky. It may be lonely to be an only child when you're a kid and there is no one to help suffer the burden of caring for your aging parent, but there is also no one to fight with about distribution of heirlooms or how much their house is worth.
I would suggest simply trying to treat each other with kindness and dignity. If one person has been burdened with much of the caregiving, he or she may feel a bit more entitled. You may think that the most valuable piece in the estate, let's say a diamond ring or necklace, should be sold to benefit everyone, but your sister may remember playing dress up like Mommy and wearing it when she was three. While everyone is stressed by their recent loss, your brother also may be struggling with the near break up of his marriage. Communicate and be as honest as possible with each other. Try to have empathy. Above all, be grateful for whatever good things do come your way as a result of the estate and DO NOT fall prey to the limiting belief that the quality of the rest of your life will be determined by what you do or do not receive.
There are two aspects to handling your parents estate to consider. The first is easy. It is simple legal paperwork. Don't attach a lot of fear or unhappiness to it. Just as when you were born, your parents filed a birth certificate announcing your name and relationship to them; paperwork will be filed announcing your death and the choices you made regarding what happened to your property. You can also file paperwork pre-deciding choices you may have in how you choose to die. Every bit of work you do towards doing that paperwork while you are still healthy is a loving gift to your children.
My father had a stroke in July 2010. He lost none of his mobility, but a very large portion of his memory. The very last check that cleared his bank account from before his stroke was one to the lawyer who drew up his Will, Trust, Durable Power of Attorney and an Advanced Health Directive regarding what lengths he would like a hospital to go to keep him alive should he need a ventilator or other machines.
I was very very lucky. I hadn't been nagging him to do any of that. Like most of you, the notion of bringing it up to him, particularly the part about the Will and Trust, felt like counting his money as my own before he died. He was 77 years old when he had those documents drawn up. He did not live to be 80.
You will need all four of those documents. Look in bookstores and online to see if you can do them yourself, but you will probably need to contact a lawyer to have them done. I had that and a few other things done a year or so ago and it cost me around $1000.00. Keep the originals. Show them to whoever insists on seeing an original, but make a lot of copies and give only those out. If you have only the Will, instead of the Will and Trust, you will lose money and wait somewhere around a year for probate to close. This is true no matter how simple the estate may seem. Do yourself a favor and make sure you get both the Will and the Trust. I cannot stress this enough.
You will need the Power of Attorney in case your parent gets dementia or is somehow otherwise incapacitated and you have to handle their affairs. Even with the Power of Attorney, you will be amazed how many businesses will insist that you fill out "their" forms regarding Power of Attorney. I was actually listed on my father's bank accounts as a co-owner, which is also a good idea to help pay for the medical bills that will begin adding up. It makes an easy transition from your father signing the checks to you signing the checks. Consider your name also being added to the title to your parents' automobiles or mobile home, if they happen to live in one.
Remember to check all medical bills against any medicare or health insurance that should be picking up part of the tab. They will not do any of the legwork for you. Avoid feeling cheap or like your parent doesn't deserve whatever medicare or assistance he or she has coming. You have no idea how long the illness will last or whatever illnesses may be waiting behind the current one. The goal is to keep your parent funded during this trying period. You can't afford to overlook any discounts or assistance that may help.
A side comment about dementia. If your parent suffers from that and is still able to live at home with you or outside caregiver assistance, at a bare minimum, remove the car keys where he or she can't find them. If you can get the car out of sight and mind, you will be happier. Trust me, you are going to hear, "When will I get to drive again?" more times than your parent ever heard "are we there yet?" It is an uncomfortable position to be in, essentially being your parents' parent. Telling him, "I didn't say you can't drive, the doctor did. They revoked your driver's license." It just doesn't get the job done.
Try to summon up all of the patience you can muster. Inside his mind, he does probably know what he wants to say. He just can't pick the right words anymore. My father went through a period where nearly everything became the word "Sine-aid." Think how frustrating it must be to think television remote and only be able to mumble "Sine-aid." Whatever personality he or she had before the stroke? If it was a bit negative or angry, expect that times two. Don't expect to receive patience in return. He feels powerless and chances are, you are the poster child for everything he thinks is currently messed up and wrong.
It is a very good time to discover small little tasks or favors he can do for you. Feeling useful and needed is an excellent combatant to the depression and boredom he may be beginning to face. Seniors with a good attitude who have dementia due to a stroke can recover quite a bit of what was lost. Or at least that was what I found when I read about it. Giving them puzzles or video games like "Big Brain Academy" can help. Try not to be too disappointed if they have a bad attitude. My father immediately sneered at any gift that showed up at his house even slightly looking like it was "good for him."
I can't offer much advice about the other aspect to handling your parents' estate. Your siblings. That was another place where I was very lucky. It may be lonely to be an only child when you're a kid and there is no one to help suffer the burden of caring for your aging parent, but there is also no one to fight with about distribution of heirlooms or how much their house is worth.
I would suggest simply trying to treat each other with kindness and dignity. If one person has been burdened with much of the caregiving, he or she may feel a bit more entitled. You may think that the most valuable piece in the estate, let's say a diamond ring or necklace, should be sold to benefit everyone, but your sister may remember playing dress up like Mommy and wearing it when she was three. While everyone is stressed by their recent loss, your brother also may be struggling with the near break up of his marriage. Communicate and be as honest as possible with each other. Try to have empathy. Above all, be grateful for whatever good things do come your way as a result of the estate and DO NOT fall prey to the limiting belief that the quality of the rest of your life will be determined by what you do or do not receive.
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
An Interesting Week
When I was much more of a pessimist, the word "interesting" always triggered the notion of the supposed Chinese Curse, "May you live in interesting times."
Is there really any such thing as "boring times?"
Anyway, this has been an interesting week. Filled with admiration and praise, love and affection, lies and deceit, disregard for my rights, and a "butt-dial" from someone I would have preferred had sincerely called. Through it all, I remain me. Standing tall and proud. Well, ok. Standing short and proud, open and loving and ready to face the upcoming week. It has left me with not much to say, though. No rants bubble up to my lips. No pearls of wisdom that I want to share with you, the anonymous, unborn children of this childless woman, in the hopes you avoid the path of my mistakes. Which must mean ……. it is time to teach you about market orders.
Never. Ever. Not ever. Place a market order for a stock. If you accidentally do, don't slit your wrists, but make note of the day and never do it again.
If you were going to buy a house, would you go to a real estate agent and say, "I really really want this house. So just take note of what everyone else says it is worth and at the end of the day, buy it for me at whatever the top price that was named." Not the lowest price. The top price.
You would never ever do that, but that is what a market order is.
Explaining to you how to place an order for a stock the first time is a bit like explaining to a young girl how to insert a tampon for the first time. Difficult without diagrams. Let's give it a whirl anyway.
You will go to a webpage at your online brokerage. It will probably be called "Trade." On this page you will select the option of "buy" or "sell." You will type in how many shares you want to buy. (On a side note, never be ashamed of how few shares of something you are capable of purchasing. It isn't like shame will miraculously lift you into being able to buy more.) You will type in the Ticker Symbol of the stock you would like to purchase. You will choose what sort of order type your order is.
Right there. That moment is the where you will be left with your wallet standing open and no idea what to do, metaphorically speaking. Market is usually the default option and you will decide that must mean it is a benign enough choice. It is. But you are doing this to capitalize on your unique capability to move in and out of the market quickly at the price ranges you want and need to make a profit.
The next option offered will probably be "limit." That is the one you want to use both when buying and selling. When you are buying, "limit" will mean: Do not buy the stock for a price HIGHER than what I have listed. When you are selling, "limit" will mean: Do not sell the stock for a price LOWER than what I have listed. You will roughly determine your price by observing what the stock is currently trading at.
As I have been typing, my day has gotten only more interesting. Which, for the record, could never be a curse. Boredom would be the curse. Some days challenge the notion that time was invented so that "everything doesn't happen at once." Today has been one of those. On days like today, everything does happen, rapid fire, at once. So let us discuss more on how to determine your price in a later blog.
Is there really any such thing as "boring times?"
Anyway, this has been an interesting week. Filled with admiration and praise, love and affection, lies and deceit, disregard for my rights, and a "butt-dial" from someone I would have preferred had sincerely called. Through it all, I remain me. Standing tall and proud. Well, ok. Standing short and proud, open and loving and ready to face the upcoming week. It has left me with not much to say, though. No rants bubble up to my lips. No pearls of wisdom that I want to share with you, the anonymous, unborn children of this childless woman, in the hopes you avoid the path of my mistakes. Which must mean ……. it is time to teach you about market orders.
Never. Ever. Not ever. Place a market order for a stock. If you accidentally do, don't slit your wrists, but make note of the day and never do it again.
If you were going to buy a house, would you go to a real estate agent and say, "I really really want this house. So just take note of what everyone else says it is worth and at the end of the day, buy it for me at whatever the top price that was named." Not the lowest price. The top price.
You would never ever do that, but that is what a market order is.
Explaining to you how to place an order for a stock the first time is a bit like explaining to a young girl how to insert a tampon for the first time. Difficult without diagrams. Let's give it a whirl anyway.
You will go to a webpage at your online brokerage. It will probably be called "Trade." On this page you will select the option of "buy" or "sell." You will type in how many shares you want to buy. (On a side note, never be ashamed of how few shares of something you are capable of purchasing. It isn't like shame will miraculously lift you into being able to buy more.) You will type in the Ticker Symbol of the stock you would like to purchase. You will choose what sort of order type your order is.
Right there. That moment is the where you will be left with your wallet standing open and no idea what to do, metaphorically speaking. Market is usually the default option and you will decide that must mean it is a benign enough choice. It is. But you are doing this to capitalize on your unique capability to move in and out of the market quickly at the price ranges you want and need to make a profit.
The next option offered will probably be "limit." That is the one you want to use both when buying and selling. When you are buying, "limit" will mean: Do not buy the stock for a price HIGHER than what I have listed. When you are selling, "limit" will mean: Do not sell the stock for a price LOWER than what I have listed. You will roughly determine your price by observing what the stock is currently trading at.
As I have been typing, my day has gotten only more interesting. Which, for the record, could never be a curse. Boredom would be the curse. Some days challenge the notion that time was invented so that "everything doesn't happen at once." Today has been one of those. On days like today, everything does happen, rapid fire, at once. So let us discuss more on how to determine your price in a later blog.
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Why I Never Learned to Cook (and why it is important)
It isn't right to judge people, even the judgmental. It is something I struggle with daily, most recently when I saw this article:
This Onion Article Perfectly Illustrates Why No One Should Judge A Person On Food Stamps
While I agree we shouldn't judge a person on food stamps, for me, the article missed a huge part of the point. The article focuses on the statistic that a growing number of America's armed service members are on food stamps, as well as many other households who have at least one person who is gainfully employed. It is the typical American stance, if I have to do something, you have to do it. If I have to be tested for drugs at my place of employment, you should be tested to get financial assistance. If I have to work, you have to work, and if you're not working, you deserve nothing. I could write and yell and whisper until I fell into my grave that this IS NOT empathy, except for oneself. It seems to plainly come from a place of resentment.
In this article, however, the point that slapped me across the face was the woman, Carol Gaither, who judged what food stamp recipients were purchasing. I've long heard concerns about them buying alcohol or cigarettes, but she resented them buying "Frosted Flakes" or other brand name goods, as well as, "high priced TV dinners." "She also notes that two whole chickens and a bag of potatoes could inexpensively feed her family for a week."
Well goody for you Carol Gaither.
Let me tell you a little about myself. I am an only child. I grew up in a middle class home. I have no debt and have never been a food stamp recipient. But if I was one, you would be standing behind me in line, judging me.
Even on Thanksgiving, the vegetables on my mother's table came from a can. No, they were not mixed into some sort of tasty casserole. They were dumped out of the can, heated on the stove or in the microwave, and placed on my plate next to dry turkey and faux potatoes. Yes, "Potato Buds." Every Friday we had "Swansons."
Would it surprise you to know there are people who have never had real potatoes? Or people working full time who have never cooked a chicken? Who would stare at a raw one like a deer in headlights having no idea what to do or even where to begin?
It was only after my mother's death and teaching myself to cook via the services of Blue Apron, that I realized my mother had probably never had what could be described as "a delicious meal" in her life. The idea certainly explained her tasteless, charcoaled, dry meats and why she never even mentioned food could taste better than this. Why she never learned to cook, I can only guess, but as she was also so shy as to be a borderline agoraphobic, an easy guess would be she never had one at a restaurant or a friend's house either.
If my mother, who was a stay-at-home housewife from the time she married my father, didn't know how to cook and never taught me, why would you assume that people who are in the situation where they have to use food stamps (in a world where they are aware they will be judged for doing so) have been trained to cook anything from scratch? When I went to college, I knew how to cook the following: boil corn on the cob, boil hot dogs, toast bread for peanut butter and jelly, and open a bag of "Peanut M&Ms."
Meanwhile, do high schools even have a class called "Home Economics" anymore, or has it gone the way of music, drama or art? Some of the things we no longer are willing to pay to teach our nation's youth are skill sets we need our nation's citizens to have. Do you honestly believe that everyone has so much debt and so little savings because they are happy living that way? Couldn't it perhaps be because Americans won't pay to have children taught about finances in school and no one at home has the knowledge to fill the gap?
Things to think about the next time you are cluck cluck clucking about anybody in public doing anything of which you personally disapprove. If you don't like it, don't do it, but remember, that person you're judging? They may not know any other way.
This Onion Article Perfectly Illustrates Why No One Should Judge A Person On Food Stamps
While I agree we shouldn't judge a person on food stamps, for me, the article missed a huge part of the point. The article focuses on the statistic that a growing number of America's armed service members are on food stamps, as well as many other households who have at least one person who is gainfully employed. It is the typical American stance, if I have to do something, you have to do it. If I have to be tested for drugs at my place of employment, you should be tested to get financial assistance. If I have to work, you have to work, and if you're not working, you deserve nothing. I could write and yell and whisper until I fell into my grave that this IS NOT empathy, except for oneself. It seems to plainly come from a place of resentment.
In this article, however, the point that slapped me across the face was the woman, Carol Gaither, who judged what food stamp recipients were purchasing. I've long heard concerns about them buying alcohol or cigarettes, but she resented them buying "Frosted Flakes" or other brand name goods, as well as, "high priced TV dinners." "She also notes that two whole chickens and a bag of potatoes could inexpensively feed her family for a week."
Well goody for you Carol Gaither.
Let me tell you a little about myself. I am an only child. I grew up in a middle class home. I have no debt and have never been a food stamp recipient. But if I was one, you would be standing behind me in line, judging me.
Even on Thanksgiving, the vegetables on my mother's table came from a can. No, they were not mixed into some sort of tasty casserole. They were dumped out of the can, heated on the stove or in the microwave, and placed on my plate next to dry turkey and faux potatoes. Yes, "Potato Buds." Every Friday we had "Swansons."
Would it surprise you to know there are people who have never had real potatoes? Or people working full time who have never cooked a chicken? Who would stare at a raw one like a deer in headlights having no idea what to do or even where to begin?
It was only after my mother's death and teaching myself to cook via the services of Blue Apron, that I realized my mother had probably never had what could be described as "a delicious meal" in her life. The idea certainly explained her tasteless, charcoaled, dry meats and why she never even mentioned food could taste better than this. Why she never learned to cook, I can only guess, but as she was also so shy as to be a borderline agoraphobic, an easy guess would be she never had one at a restaurant or a friend's house either.
If my mother, who was a stay-at-home housewife from the time she married my father, didn't know how to cook and never taught me, why would you assume that people who are in the situation where they have to use food stamps (in a world where they are aware they will be judged for doing so) have been trained to cook anything from scratch? When I went to college, I knew how to cook the following: boil corn on the cob, boil hot dogs, toast bread for peanut butter and jelly, and open a bag of "Peanut M&Ms."
Meanwhile, do high schools even have a class called "Home Economics" anymore, or has it gone the way of music, drama or art? Some of the things we no longer are willing to pay to teach our nation's youth are skill sets we need our nation's citizens to have. Do you honestly believe that everyone has so much debt and so little savings because they are happy living that way? Couldn't it perhaps be because Americans won't pay to have children taught about finances in school and no one at home has the knowledge to fill the gap?
Things to think about the next time you are cluck cluck clucking about anybody in public doing anything of which you personally disapprove. If you don't like it, don't do it, but remember, that person you're judging? They may not know any other way.
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Fad of the Day Stocks and Why You Won't Make Any Money ...
The other day a friend shared a "High Times" article about marijuana stocks. This is what I told her ...
I'll warn you, I don't think they will pan out.
It's like we think it's our chance to be Steve Wozniak, Steve Jobs or Bill Gates. Except we forget. None of those people bought a penny stock. What they did was build something that had only been a dream in their imagination and a company grew out of it.
At the same time, I think most of us spend at least a short time thinking that way. We think of the stock market as a place where if we could only get the right tip, we would buy the next Google and ride that rocket to wealth. While there very likely could be somebody who bought GOOG at the IPO (Initial Public Offering) and who still holds it and a very impressive return, almost no one actually becomes wealthy that way.
In fact, let's take apart the Google myth right now. Before there was an IPO, private venture capitalists were the shareholders. The first outside funding for Google came from a $100,000 contribution from Andy Bechtolsheim, co-founder of Sun Microsystems. Needing more funding, the next rounds came from Venture Capital firms Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers and Sequoia Capital. Five years after that first contribution, Google announced their IPO which was offered at ..... $85/share. (Google Info as per Wikipedia.)
Not exactly that penny stock you were dreaming about, is it? In fact, if you didn't know what you already know about Google, the IPO happened today and you had a chance to buy shares, would you? At $85/share, you probably still wouldn't.
That's because it isn't about Google or the money. It's about the dream and the dream isn't really about wealth. It's about recognition. It's about finally being recognized and rewarded as the special deserving individual you instinctively know you are inside.
Like an over-the-top wedding, it is about one supernova moment in the sun. Your moment. Your day. Even if it is just a millisecond, it is the superlative you think will redeem the rest of your poor life.
I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but life doesn't work that way.
Let's tackle your life's redemption first. Nothing. Not a soul mate. Not buying Google at $85/share or AAPL at $22/share (AAPL's IPO price.) Not a bigger house, nicer car or a speedboat will make your life seem like shinola if it currently feels like sh&t to you.
Happiness is an inside job.
I'll tell you something I recently learned that helped me. I always looked at the world ... let's say like a big oatmeal cookie. I would look at it, full of hunger and anticipation, and spot all the little negative raisins. So I was constantly noticing and focusing on all the things that made the world less than. Why does this have to be here? Why do you have to be like that?
The Law of Attraction teaches us to focus on what we want NOT what we don't want. Besides that, life is just much more fun if you are noticing the good stuff. So now, I just assume the world around me is probably having a little bit of a rough day. I assume someone will launch into a negative rant at any moment and I don't take any notice. (I try not to.) Instead, I notice positivity. Or, I ignore the raisins I'm not so fond of, and when I discover a chocolate chip there instead, I celebrate.
The bigger the celebration. The better I feel. The bigger the celebration, the more my good mood seems to rub off on the people around me.
It really is a beautiful thing.
Now, let's look at actually buying stocks.
Once upon a time, someone told me that "day trading" is roughly like walking behind a cart carrying a huge palate of coins and the trader is stooping, picking up and pocketing anything that drops off. While a not very glamorous, yet colorful metaphor, it is also quite accurate. Like any other way of making money, trading stocks is only inherently fun for somebody who is naturally attracted by it. All others will find it dreadfully boring. That's why wealthy people tend not to invest on their own. It's why they have financial managers.
Remember being in school? Remember the first time you played volleyball, basketball, tennis or football? Some of those sports you wanted to play all day every day. Other ones you would have paid money for an excuse not to suit up.
Life, and for that matter love, is about about finding the things that make you excited to suit up.
If you can always be excited by your partner, even when they have a bit of snot outside their nose or are being a bit of a a$s, there is an excellent chance you will always love them.
Confucius said, "Choose a job you love, and you'll never have to work a day in your life."
There is a way to make more money than you do out there. You just have to figure out what it is. That soul mate? They're out there too. The perfect job. Everything you want is waiting, but you have some leg work to do.
Find out what you love. C'mon. Think about it. There is NO bad there. You try things and just decide whether or not you like them. Your life's job, becoming YOU, IS a dream job!
Meanwhile, if you are like me and believe that trading stocks will be one of the tools in your "I love doing this" arsenal. This is how I began.
1. Accumulate $6000.00 of disposable wealth. This simply means $6000.00, you don't WANT to lose, but would not feel like the world was ending if you did lose. Don't give me any of that "if I could do that, I wouldn't be looking for help" nonsense. You save the $6000.00, paycheck by paycheck, a little at a time. If it is something you really want to do, you will set the money aside with the same enthusiasm you have when spending it on shoes, games or DVDs.
2. Deposit the money in an online, low cost, stock trading account. I use Scottrade.
3. This is backtracking a bit, but while you are accumulating the wealth, begin researching stocks. Aka: read my blog, watch Mad Money with Jim Cramer or a similar show, watch CNBC, Fox Business or Bloomberg. Seek out things around you that can teach you about stocks. (Or whatever else you are gearing up to try and see if it is one of the things you love.) DON'T get emotionally hung up by fretting that you can't buy this or that right now. Don't watch it with an eye to every opportunity that you are missing. Opportunities are like ocean waves. There are always more building up on the horizon.
4. I'll explain more in depth in a future blog entry, but at this point, just follow these rules:
* Do not buy any stock for less than $6/share.
* Do not buy any stock that is traded as an OTC (Over the Counter) or a Pink Sheet stock. Only buy stocks traded (assuming you are an American) on the NASDAQ or NYSE. If you don't know what those are yet, you haven't been reading enough. If you are from another country, here is Wikipedia's list of stock exchanges: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_stock_exchanges
*Limit yourself to 5 or 6 different names. Each name should come from a different type of business. For example: A tech name, a product you would buy at your grocery store, a business you do business with (I like to buy names that make me pay money to them that give dividends. It's like making them pay me to pay them.) Some sort of financial. The last name, number 5 or 6, should be that wild hair Google/fad shot in the dark. A completely speculative name that you believe is a great idea.
*Don't buy all those names in one sitting. If you truly end up loving the stock market, you will enjoy building your portfolio and choosing those names just like other people enjoy picking bridesmaids or Fantasy Football teams.
*Businesses report their earnings on a quarterly basis. Be aware when your companies are reporting and keep your eye open for anything that may indicate things have changed in your company's outlook.
*If any of your stocks drop 8% or more. Sell them. We'll talk about how to refine your stock purchases and highs/lows later, but keep in mind, the only reason anyone lost all their money with a stock like Enron, is because they never sold it. If they had sold after losing 8%, they would have still had money to aim at some other name. They would have been holding that other name while watching other people moan and cry. When I started trading in the stock market, I began to look at money like a big pool of water. I can choose a name that makes my pool smaller, but as long as I don't overstay my welcome, I can always move to another name that will make my pool larger again.
*Just like gambling in Vegas, if you haven't sold the stock, you haven't banked the gains. If you ride fictitious ticker symbol up from $6/share to $600/share, you will never have actually gained any of that money if you ride it all the way back to $5/share.
*Unlike gambling in Vegas, never "double down" (or buy more shares of an already losing stock) expecting things to get better or change. It is just begging to lose more money than you already have.
*Never resist selling a stock because you have made a profit and you don't want to pay the tax. That is essentially telling the universe you don't really want any money.
*Some places, including CNBC when they have their portfolio competition, let you build a Fantasy Stock Portfolio and track your progress. That can be an excellent way to test whether or not you enjoy the stock market without actually putting any money at risk.
I'll warn you, I don't think they will pan out.
It's like we think it's our chance to be Steve Wozniak, Steve Jobs or Bill Gates. Except we forget. None of those people bought a penny stock. What they did was build something that had only been a dream in their imagination and a company grew out of it.
At the same time, I think most of us spend at least a short time thinking that way. We think of the stock market as a place where if we could only get the right tip, we would buy the next Google and ride that rocket to wealth. While there very likely could be somebody who bought GOOG at the IPO (Initial Public Offering) and who still holds it and a very impressive return, almost no one actually becomes wealthy that way.
In fact, let's take apart the Google myth right now. Before there was an IPO, private venture capitalists were the shareholders. The first outside funding for Google came from a $100,000 contribution from Andy Bechtolsheim, co-founder of Sun Microsystems. Needing more funding, the next rounds came from Venture Capital firms Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers and Sequoia Capital. Five years after that first contribution, Google announced their IPO which was offered at ..... $85/share. (Google Info as per Wikipedia.)
Not exactly that penny stock you were dreaming about, is it? In fact, if you didn't know what you already know about Google, the IPO happened today and you had a chance to buy shares, would you? At $85/share, you probably still wouldn't.
That's because it isn't about Google or the money. It's about the dream and the dream isn't really about wealth. It's about recognition. It's about finally being recognized and rewarded as the special deserving individual you instinctively know you are inside.
Like an over-the-top wedding, it is about one supernova moment in the sun. Your moment. Your day. Even if it is just a millisecond, it is the superlative you think will redeem the rest of your poor life.
I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but life doesn't work that way.
Let's tackle your life's redemption first. Nothing. Not a soul mate. Not buying Google at $85/share or AAPL at $22/share (AAPL's IPO price.) Not a bigger house, nicer car or a speedboat will make your life seem like shinola if it currently feels like sh&t to you.
Happiness is an inside job.
I'll tell you something I recently learned that helped me. I always looked at the world ... let's say like a big oatmeal cookie. I would look at it, full of hunger and anticipation, and spot all the little negative raisins. So I was constantly noticing and focusing on all the things that made the world less than. Why does this have to be here? Why do you have to be like that?
The Law of Attraction teaches us to focus on what we want NOT what we don't want. Besides that, life is just much more fun if you are noticing the good stuff. So now, I just assume the world around me is probably having a little bit of a rough day. I assume someone will launch into a negative rant at any moment and I don't take any notice. (I try not to.) Instead, I notice positivity. Or, I ignore the raisins I'm not so fond of, and when I discover a chocolate chip there instead, I celebrate.
The bigger the celebration. The better I feel. The bigger the celebration, the more my good mood seems to rub off on the people around me.
It really is a beautiful thing.
Now, let's look at actually buying stocks.
Once upon a time, someone told me that "day trading" is roughly like walking behind a cart carrying a huge palate of coins and the trader is stooping, picking up and pocketing anything that drops off. While a not very glamorous, yet colorful metaphor, it is also quite accurate. Like any other way of making money, trading stocks is only inherently fun for somebody who is naturally attracted by it. All others will find it dreadfully boring. That's why wealthy people tend not to invest on their own. It's why they have financial managers.
Remember being in school? Remember the first time you played volleyball, basketball, tennis or football? Some of those sports you wanted to play all day every day. Other ones you would have paid money for an excuse not to suit up.
Life, and for that matter love, is about about finding the things that make you excited to suit up.
If you can always be excited by your partner, even when they have a bit of snot outside their nose or are being a bit of a a$s, there is an excellent chance you will always love them.
Confucius said, "Choose a job you love, and you'll never have to work a day in your life."
There is a way to make more money than you do out there. You just have to figure out what it is. That soul mate? They're out there too. The perfect job. Everything you want is waiting, but you have some leg work to do.
Find out what you love. C'mon. Think about it. There is NO bad there. You try things and just decide whether or not you like them. Your life's job, becoming YOU, IS a dream job!
Meanwhile, if you are like me and believe that trading stocks will be one of the tools in your "I love doing this" arsenal. This is how I began.
1. Accumulate $6000.00 of disposable wealth. This simply means $6000.00, you don't WANT to lose, but would not feel like the world was ending if you did lose. Don't give me any of that "if I could do that, I wouldn't be looking for help" nonsense. You save the $6000.00, paycheck by paycheck, a little at a time. If it is something you really want to do, you will set the money aside with the same enthusiasm you have when spending it on shoes, games or DVDs.
2. Deposit the money in an online, low cost, stock trading account. I use Scottrade.
3. This is backtracking a bit, but while you are accumulating the wealth, begin researching stocks. Aka: read my blog, watch Mad Money with Jim Cramer or a similar show, watch CNBC, Fox Business or Bloomberg. Seek out things around you that can teach you about stocks. (Or whatever else you are gearing up to try and see if it is one of the things you love.) DON'T get emotionally hung up by fretting that you can't buy this or that right now. Don't watch it with an eye to every opportunity that you are missing. Opportunities are like ocean waves. There are always more building up on the horizon.
4. I'll explain more in depth in a future blog entry, but at this point, just follow these rules:
* Do not buy any stock for less than $6/share.
* Do not buy any stock that is traded as an OTC (Over the Counter) or a Pink Sheet stock. Only buy stocks traded (assuming you are an American) on the NASDAQ or NYSE. If you don't know what those are yet, you haven't been reading enough. If you are from another country, here is Wikipedia's list of stock exchanges: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_stock_exchanges
*Limit yourself to 5 or 6 different names. Each name should come from a different type of business. For example: A tech name, a product you would buy at your grocery store, a business you do business with (I like to buy names that make me pay money to them that give dividends. It's like making them pay me to pay them.) Some sort of financial. The last name, number 5 or 6, should be that wild hair Google/fad shot in the dark. A completely speculative name that you believe is a great idea.
*Don't buy all those names in one sitting. If you truly end up loving the stock market, you will enjoy building your portfolio and choosing those names just like other people enjoy picking bridesmaids or Fantasy Football teams.
*Businesses report their earnings on a quarterly basis. Be aware when your companies are reporting and keep your eye open for anything that may indicate things have changed in your company's outlook.
*If any of your stocks drop 8% or more. Sell them. We'll talk about how to refine your stock purchases and highs/lows later, but keep in mind, the only reason anyone lost all their money with a stock like Enron, is because they never sold it. If they had sold after losing 8%, they would have still had money to aim at some other name. They would have been holding that other name while watching other people moan and cry. When I started trading in the stock market, I began to look at money like a big pool of water. I can choose a name that makes my pool smaller, but as long as I don't overstay my welcome, I can always move to another name that will make my pool larger again.
*Just like gambling in Vegas, if you haven't sold the stock, you haven't banked the gains. If you ride fictitious ticker symbol up from $6/share to $600/share, you will never have actually gained any of that money if you ride it all the way back to $5/share.
*Unlike gambling in Vegas, never "double down" (or buy more shares of an already losing stock) expecting things to get better or change. It is just begging to lose more money than you already have.
*Never resist selling a stock because you have made a profit and you don't want to pay the tax. That is essentially telling the universe you don't really want any money.
*Some places, including CNBC when they have their portfolio competition, let you build a Fantasy Stock Portfolio and track your progress. That can be an excellent way to test whether or not you enjoy the stock market without actually putting any money at risk.
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
aha Moment
How can I say this? My mother used to discipline the family dog with a broom. She used to throw cats into our swimming pool, with me playing "catcher" in case they got into trouble, for entertainment. At a very young age I felt the awkward discomfort of being a partner to what I felt was a cruel act with which I was not in agreement.
The worst punishment I ever dealt an animal when I was a child was singing to the dog. My hand shaped like a microphone doing my best Judy Garland. As a young married woman, people told me the best way to get our Siberian Husky puppy to stop howling in the backyard was to slap her in the jaw. Hating the idea, I tried it only to be reduced to tears. I have had moments where my pets felt like the only friends I had. I would never ever abuse them. No rubbing their nose in a mess that they made. No screaming at them or striking them for breaking or soiling some possession of mine. It is simply an inanimate object and my pet is my friend and a creature to which I have made promises.
Today, my cat Peabody, the absolute love of my life, climbed onto the desk while I was working on the computer. Photographs I found in my deceased parents estate went sailing to the floor as his little kitty paws tried to find a comfy spot. I was smiling as I gently lifted him off the desk and set him into my lap, but then I was treated to the most wonderful of aha moments.
Trying to finish up my work so I could give him my undivided attention, I suddenly could hear his purr over anything else in the room. I could feel his purr rumbling my lap. Peabody is not really a lap cat and usually can be expected to settle on one for only a minute or two. Today, he seemed quite content to stay there indefinitely.
I ruffled the fur on his head until I could see his inner eyelids. Contentment. For both of us.
Noticing the scattering of my parents photos, I thought of my mother. "She could never have experienced this," I thought.
She would have yelled at her cat. No doubt throwing something or waving her hands to dislodge him. He would have run in fear from her and trusted her less the next time. My mother's cats had to be locked in the bedroom with her when she wanted them to stay. Peabody leads me through the house like he is guiding the presidential motorcade and sleeps with me every night, door open.
I am not a stranger to anger issues. If I did spring from the womb as enlightened as I am now, I spent many years lost from myself. I did have one cat who, while I never ever struck him, did hear far too much of my voice raised. I hated myself a little more each time I noticed how much more skittish he was becoming. I don't believe in anger management. I believe in not being angry.
No matter how normally placid you are or how volatile, in that moment when you feel the beast rising up your chest and calling voice and limbs to act, what if you stopped? Just waited. Pretend you are in a separate place where time has frozen. In that moment, there is raw potential.
Think about it. Why are you angry? It has everything to do with you. You feel like you have been slighted or ignored; treated to an injustice; been pushed past a threshold; or don't have a voice. Someone has inadvertently rubbed salt in your interior wounds. You have been triggered.
You can build an army of creatures who tiptoe around you, careful of your broken parts, but it will never make you feel any better.
Feel the solid heaviness in your chest. Feel the anger sting with near physicality. It hurts.
You really do have to do something different to make your life change. Do something different to feel something new.
What if, instead of the world letting you down, you are the one letting you down?
In that moment, while your anger is building, think of yourself as a god. Think of yourself as Poseidon or Neptune. You can be the storm that leaves wreckage in its wake, leaving everyone, including yourself, a little worse off than you were before. Or you can observe the anger just as if it was a hurricane or tsunami. Powerful, finite, meaningless.
It's just an emotion. It's just a hiccup of a ghost of the way someone once made you feel and you didn't like it. Depending on the circumstances, you didn't like it and you didn't feel right again for hours or maybe weeks afterwards. Worst of all, you actually served someone you love and care about a big steaming plate of something you would never want for yourself. Like my mother's cat, you trusted someone less and you passed along the baton by nurturing people who trust you less.
That trust is what you want. In that trust is love, respect, admiration, all the wonderful gifts you feel you are being denied. You build that trust. Each time you pass up the opportunity to "tear someone a new one," you lay another brick on the foundation.
Anyone who has to ask whether it is better to be feared or loved, has never felt love. If you have lived a life where creatures are free to love and trust you, guess what happens?
They love and trust you. I've found my pets even seem to instinctively know when I need a few more furry passes against my leg or a rumbling purr in my ear.
It's a beautiful thing.
You might be thinking. "But Angela, the title of this blog is 'No One Taught You About Money' and the only thing my anger has to do with money is how I feel when there's not enough of it."
Money responds to a quiet faith in its abundance. Money wants you to spend it. Not frivolously, but with kindness, intelligence, generosity and the faith you will always have more than enough. Those are all quiet and gentle mindsets. Consider them butterflies that will never land on a volatile surface. Have you ever trained a dog to come "off leash?" The miracle happens because the dog believes that you are the best and happiest experience to be had against the enticement of all other possibilities. Things happen when you can set aside dwelling on yourself and your own pain and focus instead on being kind, gentle and nurturing of others.
Your life changes and along with the change, come opportunities and possibilities for all the things you ever wanted.
The worst punishment I ever dealt an animal when I was a child was singing to the dog. My hand shaped like a microphone doing my best Judy Garland. As a young married woman, people told me the best way to get our Siberian Husky puppy to stop howling in the backyard was to slap her in the jaw. Hating the idea, I tried it only to be reduced to tears. I have had moments where my pets felt like the only friends I had. I would never ever abuse them. No rubbing their nose in a mess that they made. No screaming at them or striking them for breaking or soiling some possession of mine. It is simply an inanimate object and my pet is my friend and a creature to which I have made promises.
Today, my cat Peabody, the absolute love of my life, climbed onto the desk while I was working on the computer. Photographs I found in my deceased parents estate went sailing to the floor as his little kitty paws tried to find a comfy spot. I was smiling as I gently lifted him off the desk and set him into my lap, but then I was treated to the most wonderful of aha moments.
Trying to finish up my work so I could give him my undivided attention, I suddenly could hear his purr over anything else in the room. I could feel his purr rumbling my lap. Peabody is not really a lap cat and usually can be expected to settle on one for only a minute or two. Today, he seemed quite content to stay there indefinitely.
I ruffled the fur on his head until I could see his inner eyelids. Contentment. For both of us.
Noticing the scattering of my parents photos, I thought of my mother. "She could never have experienced this," I thought.
She would have yelled at her cat. No doubt throwing something or waving her hands to dislodge him. He would have run in fear from her and trusted her less the next time. My mother's cats had to be locked in the bedroom with her when she wanted them to stay. Peabody leads me through the house like he is guiding the presidential motorcade and sleeps with me every night, door open.
I am not a stranger to anger issues. If I did spring from the womb as enlightened as I am now, I spent many years lost from myself. I did have one cat who, while I never ever struck him, did hear far too much of my voice raised. I hated myself a little more each time I noticed how much more skittish he was becoming. I don't believe in anger management. I believe in not being angry.
No matter how normally placid you are or how volatile, in that moment when you feel the beast rising up your chest and calling voice and limbs to act, what if you stopped? Just waited. Pretend you are in a separate place where time has frozen. In that moment, there is raw potential.
Think about it. Why are you angry? It has everything to do with you. You feel like you have been slighted or ignored; treated to an injustice; been pushed past a threshold; or don't have a voice. Someone has inadvertently rubbed salt in your interior wounds. You have been triggered.
You can build an army of creatures who tiptoe around you, careful of your broken parts, but it will never make you feel any better.
Feel the solid heaviness in your chest. Feel the anger sting with near physicality. It hurts.
You really do have to do something different to make your life change. Do something different to feel something new.
What if, instead of the world letting you down, you are the one letting you down?
In that moment, while your anger is building, think of yourself as a god. Think of yourself as Poseidon or Neptune. You can be the storm that leaves wreckage in its wake, leaving everyone, including yourself, a little worse off than you were before. Or you can observe the anger just as if it was a hurricane or tsunami. Powerful, finite, meaningless.
It's just an emotion. It's just a hiccup of a ghost of the way someone once made you feel and you didn't like it. Depending on the circumstances, you didn't like it and you didn't feel right again for hours or maybe weeks afterwards. Worst of all, you actually served someone you love and care about a big steaming plate of something you would never want for yourself. Like my mother's cat, you trusted someone less and you passed along the baton by nurturing people who trust you less.
That trust is what you want. In that trust is love, respect, admiration, all the wonderful gifts you feel you are being denied. You build that trust. Each time you pass up the opportunity to "tear someone a new one," you lay another brick on the foundation.
Anyone who has to ask whether it is better to be feared or loved, has never felt love. If you have lived a life where creatures are free to love and trust you, guess what happens?
They love and trust you. I've found my pets even seem to instinctively know when I need a few more furry passes against my leg or a rumbling purr in my ear.
It's a beautiful thing.
You might be thinking. "But Angela, the title of this blog is 'No One Taught You About Money' and the only thing my anger has to do with money is how I feel when there's not enough of it."
Money responds to a quiet faith in its abundance. Money wants you to spend it. Not frivolously, but with kindness, intelligence, generosity and the faith you will always have more than enough. Those are all quiet and gentle mindsets. Consider them butterflies that will never land on a volatile surface. Have you ever trained a dog to come "off leash?" The miracle happens because the dog believes that you are the best and happiest experience to be had against the enticement of all other possibilities. Things happen when you can set aside dwelling on yourself and your own pain and focus instead on being kind, gentle and nurturing of others.
Your life changes and along with the change, come opportunities and possibilities for all the things you ever wanted.
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
The Rule of 72
I'm going to have a short blog entry this week. I came down with a sinus infection or the flu or something, so I'm going to post something I posted on my Facebook page "Angiece" because, frankly, it bears repeating.
The Rule of 72
If you divide 72 by the interest rate you are earning on your money, you can find out how long it would take to double your money.
To make it easy to understand, use 10% (although pretty much nobody is earning that.)
72/10% = 7.2
so you would double your money every 7.2 years ....
Back before 2008, ING and other online banks were offering 4% ...... so we can guesstimate you would have doubled your money about every 16 years .... but .... the high interest rates only lasted a couple of years.
Meanwhile, if you think about your debt, your mortgage or your credit cards, those interest rates represent how quickly the financial institution making the loan stands to DOUBLE THEIR MONEY.
For a lot of Americans, even if they do have savings, it is in a bank earning less than 1% nowadays.
While the wealthy have the knowledge and resources where, if the savings accounts only pay what they are paying now, they move their assets someplace else.
Sometimes the stock market actually has dips simply because the wealthy have seen an indicator that told them it was time to move their money.
The Rule of 72
If you divide 72 by the interest rate you are earning on your money, you can find out how long it would take to double your money.
To make it easy to understand, use 10% (although pretty much nobody is earning that.)
72/10% = 7.2
so you would double your money every 7.2 years ....
Back before 2008, ING and other online banks were offering 4% ...... so we can guesstimate you would have doubled your money about every 16 years .... but .... the high interest rates only lasted a couple of years.
Meanwhile, if you think about your debt, your mortgage or your credit cards, those interest rates represent how quickly the financial institution making the loan stands to DOUBLE THEIR MONEY.
For a lot of Americans, even if they do have savings, it is in a bank earning less than 1% nowadays.
While the wealthy have the knowledge and resources where, if the savings accounts only pay what they are paying now, they move their assets someplace else.
Sometimes the stock market actually has dips simply because the wealthy have seen an indicator that told them it was time to move their money.
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